what i wanted to write:
Dear Beijing Client:
Please, do make a trip down to Singapore. It is a clean, lovely, sunshiny place with world-class shopping and international fare.
Also, don't forget to stop by our workplace (you know where it is). We will be very happy to receive you, especially me, after I have SNAPPED YOUR FAT NECK IN TWO AND POKED MILLIONS OF LITTLE HOLES INTO YOUR STOMACH WITH THE HEEL OF MY SHOE.
It has not been a pleasure working with you, and I sure do hope this issue comes out pronto so I will never ever see your fair little face or read your ridiculous China-English emails demanding that I work like a freaking ant, day and night to shit out a story for you.
ps/ Bug me on Saturday again and I will personally fly there to smash your phone and make you eat it. Be a bitch on Monday Morning again and my lovely, you better run.
Warmest regards,
Angeline Yeo
Journalist
what i wrote:
Dear Client,
Thank you for your email. Please find attached the amended cover story for your retention.
Regards,
Angeline Yeo
Journalist