And then this happens.

Sometimes you feel a cold, cold finger touch the insides of your tummy that turns your gut to ice. Then your icy gut turns your oesophagus icy, which makes your throat close up. Then that which was once your heart turns into a solid heart-shaped ice cube. Finally your arms and legs feel foreign and you're thinking: weird, my whole body is feels like frozen ham but I swear my face is hot and sweat beads are starting to form on my forehead.

 

Then for about 5 minutes you feel a little lightheaded, and the urge to throw up becomes overpowering.

 

Suddenly you remember you need to breathe and you take one breath. Then two, then three.

 

Slowly everything eases up, you start to thaw out and your brain - the most important organ of all - begins to work again. "You stupid fool," it says.

 

And that's all you really need to hear. You shake off the invisible ice but take a swig of your hot tea anyway, just for good measure.

 

You stupid fool.