its funny how reading something sometimes makes you think bout something totally unrelated.

"if in the dark we lose sight of love,
hold my hand and have no fear,
i will be here.
i will be here when you feel like being quiet,
when you need to speak your mind,
i will listen,
i will be here,
when the laughter turns to crying,
thru the winning, losing and trying,
we'll be together...
i will be here."

sigh. how nice is this song? or maybe i'm just being sappy. or maybe, just maybe, solaris is just getting so blardy boring that i have taken to paying more attention to clay aiken than...than... mimoids and symmetriads and what have you. in any case, does anyone know who sang the original, because i'm thinking clay didnt.

ai. clay. maybe its just my mood, or its just clay, but now when i listen to him i remember AJ, being in her room while she so proudly shows me every clay aiken clip she downloaded [sometimes the same event shot from a different camera], and she'd tell me for hours what clay did yesterday, today, and what he's got planned tomorrow and the next, and the next. she's such a huge fan, its amazing. she even made a trip down to the US just to catch his concert, and talk to him. and talk to him she did. watching her being so happy just talking about clay always left a bittersweet taste in my mouth. i know she's happy, but i also know that she's only so happy, because she thought she'd found someone so famous, yet so down to earth [she thinks] and so incredibly wonderful to help her renew her faith in men. argh. and she knows this too. its so hard to see a grown woman tell you, that men are all jerks, especially when she sometimes refers specifically to her son whom you're dating how do you react to something like that?

in any case, she's a wonderful woman, and i dont think any girl has ever ever gotten along so well with her boyfriend's mother. i think it was just her, tho. because i'm usually quiet around people's parents. she was more than just Lenny's mom, more than just Len's cool mom who talks to me about sex [yes, i nearly died right there.] and makes me call her AJ instead of Auntie Jane. she spoke to me like i was her friend, and we shared clothes, along with many, many tears. i miss ya AJ.